Now, when people get into relationships in other parts of the world, it is mainly for the sake of mutual love and understanding, and to help them build each other. This may not be the exact situation in Africa. Whenever two people of marriageable age come together in Nigeria, the major focus is not always on the mutual love enjoyed by both at the moment. More than 80 percent of Nigerian men and women go into relationships with a look at the long run, and therefore the ultimate aim is always marriage. This is why it is always imminent for your girlfriend of 6 months to 2 years to be of the firm belief that the next line of action should be to come to his people and pay his bride price. However, this may not be the case with Anambra men. The experience is completely different.
I came into Owerri on the second of February and started checking on old friends. I asked about a very close female friend and former school mate who have been dating a professional footballer from Anambra state for more than 4 years. The answer I got was more than appalling.
In the “African minds” of all of us, this relationship is ripe and is heading for marriage. The bond got even tighter when the man started giving the girl some hope of marrying her. However, the natural trend with Anambra men reared its head when he travelled home for Christmas holidays and had some tete a tete with his mother.
According to the girlfriend, he called her up on the 23rd of January and told her that “Mama anyi si na agam alu onye be anyi,” meaning that his mama said that he must marry from their community. Now, one thing that is noticeable about this is the fact that this guy was so innocent that he couldn’t find any lies to tell the girl. So, he had to lay bare the real reason exactly way it came from his people.
This got the girl so devastated that she has vowed never to do anything with Anambra men again. But this is not a one-off story. I have an Aunt that lived with a man from Ekwulobia in Aguata local government area for more than 5 years, only for the man to come up with stories of how his people told him that marriage between people of his community and ours has never worked. It was later discovered that the mother has already found a girl for her from their village.
The question is; what is really significant and special about marrying girls from people’s close community. And, are those girls only good for marriage and not relationships. Yes, you cannot tell me that girls from every other part of the world make great dates, but only girls from your village in Anambra will make the perfect wife. Are these men marrying for themselves or for their mothers……………? Let us know in the comment box below.